I miss Mikey. Classic commercials like Life cereal featuring innocent kids testing out a product seem like a thing of the past. As I watched the morning news roll into commercial break after commercial break I couldn’t help but find myself rolling my eyes. Here’s a list of reasons why:
- Shaq cannot comfortably sit in that Buick (they never even showed a shot of him getting into it!)
- Salma Hayek probably is not buying her own milk, and if she is she is not going to those great lengths to do so
- Your eyelashes will not look like the model in the mascara commercial unless you put false eyelashes on before-hand
- The girl who is told she’s being set up on a blind date but needs to whiten her teeth before she meets him already has white teeth before she uses the toothpaste. So by no means will the toothpaste make your teeth become pearly white in a couple of weeks.
- The underwear commercials that sell you bras with back smoothing technology and panties with a vanishing tummy control panel uses a stick thin model with no bust line and no body fat. She doesn’t need the product they are selling!
- All the pharmaceutical companies that sell the cure for what ails you but then has a laundry list of all the insane side effects that could potentially send you to an early grave
What’s highlighted above is not earth shattering news. We all know the phrase “false advertising” – the airwaves, internet and print media are riddled with it. I worked in advertising for seven years so I know the drill. The first few months at the agency I was learning about the work that had been created, as well as meeting all my co-workers. I realized quickly that the model named Marjorie in one of the print ads was my co-worker Teresa. Welcome to advertising, kid!
When I was a kid I loved watching the sitcom One Day at a Time. I always remembered the episode where Ann Romano, an account executive at the advertising firm Conners & Davenport, had to come up with advertising copy for an ice cream brand. She needed to eat the various flavors to get inspiration. As an ice cream lover, I thought that was a cool gig and it left an impression on me. Fast forward a couple of decades and there I was in the industry that sold the dream of a better product, service or tomorrow.
In the spirit of fast forwarding I should take advantage of living in a digital world now by just skipping through those silly commercials. That may not stop the false advertising but it will reduce the eye rolling.